By Doug Brunk

Early in his career as a physician associate in dermatology, Joe Cari, MPAS, PA-C, received a negative online review from a patient that really got under his skin.

"It said something like, 'Do not see Joe the fake doctor. Joe should have his medical license pulled. He didn't listen to me. He threw drugs at me and he only talked to me for 5 minutes,'" Cari, who practices at the University of Colorado Anschutz Medical Campus, Aurora, said at the Society of Dermatology Physician Associates (SDPA) 22nd Annual Fall Dermatology Conference. "Being early in my practice, that hurt; it was a jab to the heart. I had about 20-30 five-star reviews, but I laser-focused on the bad one."

When a review questions competence, it can feel personal, he continued, even though it often reflects the reviewer's emotions or experience. Cari, a former Marine, said that clinicians can mitigate emotional responses to negative reviews by building emotional resilience. He draws inspiration from Stoicism (the school of philosophy that originated during the Hellenistic period), which emphasizes developing inner resilience, managing emotions, "and cultivating virtues such as wisdom, courage, and self-discipline," he said.

Cari often cites a quote from Marcus Aurelius, the former Roman Emperor and Stoic philosopher: "You have power over your mind — not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength." Another quote that changed his perspective comes from the Stoic Epictetus: "We cannot control the external events around us, but we can control our reactions to them."

On a practical level, Cari shared several ways that clinicians can cultivate emotional resilience when faced with a negative review.

Practice mindfulness. Reading reviews in a nonjudgmental way "allows us to pause, reflect, and respond thoughtfully rather than react emotionally," he explained. He also recommended setting clear boundaries between work and personal life to prevent burnout and maintain a healthy work–life balance. Realizing he needed time to decompress after a previous job that involved a 1-hour drive, he began listening to audiobooks on his way home. "I set that time aside for myself to listen, relax, and let all my troubles from work melt away," Cari said.

Develop a support network. This includes both professionals, such as therapists, and personal connections, such as colleagues, mentors, and friends.

Practice self-care. Whether it's yoga, running, jogging, spending time with loved ones, or playing with your dog, find activities that help you recharge. "Most importantly, get some rest and take a vacation," Cari advised. "Your body is like a machine. If you do not rest it and take care of it, it will slowly breakdown and burnout."

Practice equanimity. Cari defined this as mental calmness, composure, and evenness of temper, especially in a difficult situation. "Maintaining a calm and balanced state of mind, regardless of external circumstances, is a core Stoic and military practice," he said.

According to data he attributed to reviewtrackers, an estimated 60% of reviews are influenced by the reviewer's personal stress or mood, "so don't take [bad reviews] personally," he said. Instead, view criticism as an opportunity for self-improvement and to gain insight into others' perspectives. Cari recommended practicing indifference to both praise and blame. "Do not seek validation or be disheartened by negative reviews," he said. "Remain focused on your own standards of excellence."

Cari has reported no relevant financial relationships.